Love Has A Meaning
by Lunaverserocks
Summary: What happens in Ravens head when something goes wrong?


Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. I do own the character that is mentioned as Trigon's other heir… enjoy and comment.

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Raven glared at the shape shifter that had just mad a fool of her. The pan beside her exploded and everybody knew to stop their 'pointless arguing' that had annoyed the dark girl immensely.

"Hey? Rae?" the green one asked.

Raven glared at the green changeling even more. Her eyes becoming slits, the pot that had just exploded was seething and bubbling even without any kind of contents in them.

"What?" she asked, baring her white fanged teeth.

"Sorry about the, uh, you know…" Beast Boy stuttered, trying to avoid the penetrating gaze that he knew he deserved.

"I don't care!" Raven shouted, still seething with rage. '_Just kill him already. You know that you really want to,'_ rage told her. _'Don't do it. You know that deep down you have feelings for the green monster,'_ love pleaded.

Ignoring her emotions, she thrust herself out of the door and toward her room, bumping into a very happy-go-lucky Starfire.

"Do you wish to do the braiding of the hair tonight Raven?" Starfire asked.

Raven leered. She ignored the ever so happy alien and stormed off into her room, making the walls crack and vibrate under her feet. The happy alien remained silent and distant from the sad demon.

Raven closed her door with such an invigorating force that it seemed to have forced the entire tower to shake with envy. She paced into the depths of her room, eyeing the giant black trunk that contained some her most dark, prized, and memorable possessions.

_'You could release that dragon on him. That would defiantly get him back and scare the living daylights out of him,'_ rage bragged._ 'Don't do it. You know that you like him,'_ love said.

"Shut it!" Raven ordered her emotions. She tore open the cover of the chest and stuffed her hand into it, searching for the one thing that she needed. A sharp knife dangled threateningly in her hand. She placed the knife to her wrists and slashed.

Red ooze trickled down her arm. She smiled curtly. She touched her arm and squeezed it, forcing more blood to rush out. Her smile weakened as her inside pain went away and was replaced with physical pain.

_'What the hell Raven!' _rage shouted._ 'Why do you want to kill me? It's not going to work, you know that Trigon isn't going to let you kill yourself just now…'_

_'Why did you do that Raven?'_ smart asked intently. _'You need to go to the hospital ward or heal yourself. Put your hand up to your arm.'_

_'No!!' _rage shouted. _'If you want to kill yourself, then your father will find a new portal. He doesn't need you that much. He can do pretty well without you. Remember, he has that other girl,'_ rage persisted. _'You know, the one who you keep having dreams about…'_

"Shut up!" Raven shouted to her emotions again. The voices were really pissing her off in her head. "I know that there is another girl, stop telling me about her…"

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Beast Boy walked to the door and heard a low grunt and a slashing sound. He knocked on the door, scared of interrupting Raven, a half demon.

Raven pulled her sleeve down to her wrist again as she walked to the door. She opened it with her powers, hiding the bloody arm behind her back.

"What do you want?" Raven asked intently.

Beast Boy stared, unable to command his mouth to move. Raven's icy eyes rolled back to the tops of her eyes and she started to close the door.

Beast Boy summed up all of the courage that he could ever muster. "SORRY RAE!!!" he shouted.

Raven stopped closing the door. She stared at the boy who had just dumped a plateful of tofu eggs on her and then made fun of her book. That hadn't bothered her at first, but when he threw her book to the other side of the room, that did it.

The boy started to smile weakly. "Go away…" Raven snorted.

The smile vanished and Raven turned around in her room. She walked to the black-sheeted bed and sat down. The door had closed long ago as she fell back into the silk sheets.

_"Great job Raven!"_ rage shouted.

_"Yes,"_ smart said. _"But, that didn't make him look like a fool. I'm pretty sure that nobody saw Beast Boy came to your room to apologize."_

_"Does it matter?"_ love asked. _"We love him remember."_

_"No,"_ rage said. "_WE love Robin."_

_"What the hell? WE do not,"_ love barked.

_"We, meaning me and Raven love the strong, leadership type," _rage smiled, feeling her mood being slightly lifted.

_"Well, I love Beast Boy and I'm LOVE. You know, the emotion…"_ love snickered.

"Shut up!" Raven shouted to her emotions. "I love nobody. I can't love. Rage, what are you evening doing out?"

Rage dispersed from Raven's mind, quickly. Raven curled up in her bed and whispered her mantra over and over again. Trying to maintain some control or stability in her mind.

The remnants of rage and love fighting echoed in her brain. 'Who do I love?' Raven thought to herself.

I would never try and do this to myself. I love my life. This is just what I think that Raven would do to herself under a lot of pressure. I'm not sure if she would shout at her emotions like that though…


End file.
